Wednesday, February 27, 2008

OMG HAHAHAHAHAAHA.

THIS BRAND OF PAD HAS THE BIGGEST PADS I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE.

SLIM AND EXTRA LONG MAN. HAHAHAHAHA.

I SHALL CALL IT WONDER PAD.

And uhh, to avoid being accused of showcasing any obscenities or whatsoever, I have decided not to put up a photo of the pad opened. But if you want a better picture.. take both your hands and place one middle finger of one hand on the base of the other hand's palm. And the size should be about right. HAHAHAHA.

Or, you could use a 30cm ruler as a gauge. Then add another 3cm to that 30cm. LOLOLOLOLOLOL.

Ahhhhhh, I cannot stop laughing.

And oh, some people asked me how come I've not been inserting the "Now Playing Music" thing anymore. Well it's just because I haven't been listening to music, duh. I've been busy going on movie marathons everyday so my iTunes has been pretty much closed. And that music function links to iTunes. So yupppp.

WONDER WOMAN USES WONDER PAD. WHEEEEEEE.

no where, at all. 9:48 pm

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

My problems are solved! Went down to M1 shop at Causeway Point and they changed a new handset for me. Apparently for M1, within dunno how many days of purchase and it's faulty, you can change to a new set. :D But damn it, if I knew that earlier, I wouldn't have wasted so much time at the nokia shop fixing the first problem it had. -_____-

But anyways I'm contented. At least now the phone's fine and dandy!

This is my old phone, taken using my new phone.

And this is my new phone, taken using my old phone.

Very obvious difference in quality of pictures eh? >.>

And this is a random picture of my laptop and hard disk just cause they happened to be there haha.

Can you tell I'm bored? xD

no where, at all. 6:37 pm

Wow. I can't believe I just fucking watched 3 movies in a row just because I can't sleep.

Fuck insomnia.

no where, at all. 5:18 am

Monday, February 25, 2008

Ahhhhhhhhhh a supposedly happy day turned out rather sad. ):

Took a friggin' 1 hour and 15 mins bus ride to Bugis and reached at about 11.30am. Lazed around, played some games while waiting for my brother and then received his sms saying he'll be late. So I said okay, and continued walking around. Then suddenly I reached up to touch my necklace like I usually do, then I realised.. ZOMG MY NECKLACE IS GONE >.< So I reached around to find it frantically and I found the necklace. BUT THE PENDANT WAS GONE. ))))))))):

The chain snapped and the pendant fell off somewhere in Bugis. I tried tracing my steps but I couldn't find it. I'm very very very very very upset. I really liked that pendant cause my cousin bought it for me from Korea. ):

So nvm.. My brother came and we proceeded to go buy my new phone. Everything went quite smoothly (or so I thought).. Then we went to have lunch at Ajisen and he left to go back for work and I left for Warner Music for the interview with Daren Tan. Waited for Jing Hui at the lobby, she came and we were still quite early so we talked a little and she briefed me on the interview and the future job scopes etc.. We went up for the interview and it went pretty well.. Daren Tan's very nice, friendly and obliging so the interview went on without a hitch.

But on the way back (Another 1 and half hour of wonderful bumpy bus riding >.<).. I tried using my new phone to call my aunt and I could hear her but she couldn't hear a thing! I thought it was just a small glitch or maybe the house phone had a problem.. So I called my brother to test whether it was my phone and omgggg, it was. ):

So after dumping my stuff back at home, I headed for Causeway Point again to get my phone fixed. They wanted to make me wait till Thursday man! But I said it was ridiculous since I just bought it in the afternoon right! So yeah, they said they'd change the whole motherboard and I'll lose all my stuff but I can get it back within 2 hours. So I went for that and in the meantime I went to have dinner and walk around... Went back to collect, the problem got fixed so I went home. BUT OMG NOW THE SIDE CAMERA BUTTON DOESN'T WORK NOW. AHHHHH WTF.

Fuck man I don't wanna go back to wait another 2 hours or go down all the way to Bugis again to the fucking m1 shop. AHH. Fuck.

Today just isn't my day. )))))):

no where, at all. 8:44 pm

Sunday, February 24, 2008

Introducing the three finalists for the highly recognised "Idiot of the Year" award.

Finalist #1

Finalist #2

Finalist #3

Who should be bestowed upon with this magnificent title? Tag on my tagboard to vote! :D Heheheeee. Or, you could waste some sms'es and tell me, HAHA.

But honestly I think Finalist #1 wins hands down. D:
___________________________________________________

And here's an idiot trying to hold up a boat.

And another idiot trying to grow a mustache.

I really enjoyed my day out with the girls, haven't spoken so much to them in a long while. (:

no where, at all. 11:49 pm

Had a rather enjoyable day out with the aunt and cousins I suppose. But I'm so beat and I still have another outing with the sec sch friends tomorrow. Heh, no rest for me even during the holidays. But honestly, I'd rather be dead tired from having fun outside than dead tired from doing endless amounts of work. >.>

Rode the DHL hot air balloon today! Rode on the Hippo open top bus as well! Shall upload some of the pictures when I actually do bother to get them from the cousin's digicam. Had dinner at Ajitei which was utterly yummy as well. :D

Sometimes I guess all you need is to get out as much as possible and keep yourself occupied so you won't think of silly things. I suppose that's the only way.

Looking forward to tomorrow. (:

Ja ne.

P.S. HEY SAILOR NEPTUNE WITH THE STUPID GREEN HAIR. LOOK HERE. STUPID / \ WILL DIE K. HE WILL GET OWNED. I REPEAT, HE WILL GET OWNED BY SASUKE-SAMA.

no where, at all. 12:34 am

Friday, February 22, 2008

Are you afraid of the dark?

Most would immediately go "of course not!" at that question without a second thought. But is it really so?

By dark, I don't mean the lights out kind of dark alone. I mean, the darkness in everyone's hearts and the darkness in everyone's minds. I realised this when the lights were out and I lay there alone. I did not fear that a monster might suddenly reach out from under my bed and grab me. Nor did I fear that there would be ghosts. No. I noticed I feared about what I was thinking, the thoughts in my head, those were what scared me.

I also noticed that I only think about these stuff when it's pitch black and you can't see what's ahead of you. It's at times like this when the darkness in everyone's minds or hearts really materialise. You shut your eyes, thinking that might make it better, but instead, it worsens the situation. More vivid images of your greatest fears appear in front of you and can't make it stop.

There's just something about darkness. It attracts people to it and yet it deters people from it at the same time. Everyone has their own deep, dark secret that they want to keep. Why is everyone curious to find out about everyone else's deep dark secrets? That was what I meant by attract. It makes us curious, it makes us want to find out more and delve deeper. But as we go along, we feel fear building up inside of us. Fear of not knowing what's ahead, the fear of uncertainty.

People go through a lot of trouble to suppress the darkness within them, not wanting to let it come out. So let me ask again.

Are you afraid of the dark?

It's no wonder I stay up all night, no matter how much I love sleep. I guess I just hate the process of falling asleep and the darkness that comes with it.

I guess I'm not making much sense again, am I?

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Now playing: Evanescence - Lithium
via FoxyTunes

no where, at all. 9:11 pm

So the interview got postponed to Monday afternoon. Which is sort of good, since I've been feeling really ill the whole day ever since I woke up this morning. I don't think I want to sneeze or cough in Daren Tan's face. >.>

Sigh. Sometimes you just feel like you're a tool. You get used when you are needed, but get kept in a corner when you're of no use. I noticed this happens virtually anywhere and practically anyone can do that to you, even those closest to you, those that are supposedly supposed to "protect" you from harm and be there for you. Be it friends or family, there are actually no exceptions when it comes to stuff like that.

But when I think back on what my Chinese tuition teacher once said.. 人生来本来就是会利用对方。不管是朋友也好，家人也好，都一样的。这是人的本性。

Basically what it means is... "It is human nature to rely and make use of people around them. Doesn't matter if it's family or friends, people will still make use of one another."

I guess that's true, since I feel like I'm just something, not even someone, that people around me like to utilise. Ah, how wise her words were. Even though she was a grumpy, violent and cheena old woman that once hit me for not doing my homework.

The sad thing is, it's not just one or two friends, not just one or two family members. I recently just noticed that practically 3/4 of my friends do that to me and my family... Heh let's just not go there. On one hand, I'm honoured that people choose to pour their hearts out to me when they're upset and stuff. But on the other hand, sometimes when you have your own problems and 23474 other people pile their problems on you too, it just gets a little bit too heavy. Reminds me of the movie "Secret Keeper". Check it out when you have the time, then you'll get a better picture of what I mean. Having said that, I'm not saying I mind people talking to me, I really don't mind. I'd willingly lend a listening ear but it's just sometimes... just sometimes... when you're feeling crappy, it's kinda hard to be cheerful for others, ya know?

I try my best to bring smiles to the faces of people around me because I treasure them. I absolutely do not ever want to be the one to cause them to be sad nor do I want to see their sad faces. I melt at the sight of said sad faces. So I try to please, I try to be more "fun" and I try to accommodate. Sometimes even at my own expense. Which is why, I find it hard to say no to someone most of the times. What I'm amazed at is how I can do all this, yet when I need this kind of support in return, it never happens. I try to speak of my problems to some friends and SOMEHOW, they manage to steer the conversation into their own direction and start speaking about their own problems again. Which at this point in time, I find hard to make them stop and steer it back in my direction. So once again, the vicious cycle continues and I end up listening to their problems again.

I haven't found anyone I could open up fully to since you've been gone. Maybe I'm just destined to not be able to find someone else like you in this lifetime.

Ahh, how I hate random emo moments.

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Now playing: Paramore - That's What You Get
via FoxyTunes

no where, at all. 4:57 am

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Okay so all we did was eat at mogumogu. And talk for like a good whole 3 hours just about...... well, stuff. Good stuff, bad stuff, happy stuff, sad stuff, family stuff, friend stuff, fun stuff and loser stuff.

First off! Mogumogu! This was what I ordered:

It's supposed to be some.... err.... caterpillar shit. No, not caterpillar's shit. Like... caterpillar thing.

I don't have a picture of what Dumbo ordered because no matter how it's called a Fluffy Teddy and is supposed to look like a teddy, it still looks like My Melody to me. SO I REFUSE TO PUT UP THE PICTURE.

Okay fine, I lied, I just didn't take a picture of her set so I can't put it up.

On the way back, there was this stupid ah lian on the mrt beside me. She's just a little shorter than me (wow how is that possible) and her hair is super long, like until almost her butt. Then she keep talking on the phone. HER HAIR KEEP ON TICKLING ME. Didn't help that the train was so crowded and I was trying to sleep standing haha. The hair was FUCKING irritating. Then I move away to stand behind this lady. Then I thought better already you know... when the train arrived at the next stop, she suddenly turned her head and her FUCKING HAIR SLAPPED ME. WTF. Ugh, I swear, people with long hair are going against me.

Anyway I'd just like to say... "NGEE ANN MASS COMM ROCKS!" Hell yeah we do, our cut off point this year is 10 POINTS DAMMIT. It's hard to get in okay. We rock okay. And WE USE APPLE LAPTOPS okay. Mwaha. Mwaha. Mwahahaha.

But honestly, this course has none of the "glamour" it promises or portrays, okay maybe just a bit. But just look at us slogging our guts out every night and you'll understand what I'm saying. But anyway, congrats to Kimberly for getting into MCM! :D Just.... -Cough- trynottodieduringthecourseofthediploma -cough-

Ahhh I have to go down to Alexandra Warner Music to get an interview with Daren Tan for Heatwave tomorrow afternooooooon. Soooooo far. ): But aiya, work means work, must do! And luckily Jing Hui is nice enough to guide me along and go with me so I probably won't die THAT badly...... I hope? The main problem is getting there. It'll probably take me an hour and a half to get there, AT LEAST. Then stay there for an hour... then come back already. D: Wth traveling time 3 times the amount of time I spend on work. >.>

Bah nevermind, I shall have my trusty iPod with me to cure my boredommmmm. I cannot sleep on the bus, I scared I miss my stop. T_T

Anyway, I guess that's all for today, I'm have more stuff to say but I'm laaaaazy and tireeeed. No idea why I'm so tired anyway since I didn't do much. But yeah, shall go check bus routes now then get ready for bed. (:

P.S. Thanks yous Dumbos. I's haves goods times talkings todays. Ands I's nots tofus ors livelys tofus. I's justs Sailors Uranuss. <3333

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Now playing: Three Days Grace - Over And Over
via FoxyTunes

no where, at all. 12:33 am

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Ahhh. Finally. It's over. Our nightmares are finally over!

So people, people............

NOW IT'S TIME TO PARTY.

Well, not exactly a lot of time left for partying since our attachments start quite soon but heh, enjoy whatever we can while we can la. :D On the way back home, I thought of a lot of stuff to blog about but now that I make myself sit in front of my laptop and blog, I can't seem to get the words out. It's the STM again, I can't friggin' help it. I bet once I get off the laptop, I'll remember what I wanted to blog about again -___-

Okay so I'm gonna fail my advert exam. But I really don't give a flying fuck about it already really. Already gave up and figured it's no use feeling lousy over it when I could be out there having fun. Not like I'm gonna take ADVANCED ADVERT next time anyway. (Haha but I know a few of you want to =x)

Okay I really seriously cannot remember what else I wanted to blog about.. And it's about time I left the house, meeting Geri in town for mogumogu and fun fun fun! :D

Shall update again later when I get back! (:

no where, at all. 5:24 pm

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Ahhh I wonder how long it has been since I've slept early and woke up early. I can't even remember. It really has been that long. Anyway, I was a good girl and slept at 12.30am last night and woke up just before 8 this morning. :D

I don't even know why I was so knackered last night that I decided to sleep so early. Yes, 12.30 is early. Because anyone that knows me well enough will know my usual sleeping times are between 5am to 7am. =P Oh now I remember, I was suffering from a headache. Regular migraines, they're back again. =/ Anyway, pardon the STM haha.

Felt good to wake up so early this morning but the only lousy thing was, I was awoken by a very very very very very VERY weird dream. Weirder than any other dream I've ever had. Yes, it's that bad, lol. So yeah, didn't bother to go back to sleep so I went out for McD's big breakfast with the aunt, which is another thing I haven't done in a looooooooong time. Followed her for grocery shopping as well, wanted to go to the library but for some weird reason it was gonna open late so decided to scrape that.

I really like grocery shopping, lol. Walking around in a supermarket looking at all the goods on display makes me happy for some reason. Anybody else feel the same way? :D Every time I walk around the supermarket, I have this urge to simply grab and buy everything I can find. But alas, noooooooo, I can't do that haha.

THE COUSIN HAD A SUDDEN URGE TO LEARN MANDARIN. D: So yes, now that makes me a temporary, no fees required tuition teacher. She went to Popular to buy the Mandarin books and to her amazement, she couldn't even qualify to buy the K1 or K2 books. -_____- She had to start from preschool level, LOL. So now, yes, I've been degraded to teaching preschool mandarin.

Anybody else needs Mandarin tuition? >.>

I can't wait for tomorrow to be over!

Advert is my friend. Advert is my friend. Advert is my friend. Advert is my friend. Advert is my friend. Advert is my friend. Advert is my friend. Advert is my friend.
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Now playing: Yellowcard - Light Up The Sky
via FoxyTunes

no where, at all. 2:52 pm

Monday, February 18, 2008

Okay, decided to do this meme that Yu Xuan tagged me to do because..... ADVERT IS KILLING ME.

List down 10 random facts about you. Then tag 5 other people to do this little meme!

I have OCD. It annoys me to no end, but I can't help it. ):
I love sports, I'd do more of it if I wasn't so lazy or busy all the time, really. JEN. DARRICK. SARINA. BADMINTON PLS. BASKETBALL OR NETBALL ALSO CAN. T_T
I get annoyed at very little things. Such as people dragging their feet.. People eating loudly.. People walking too slowly yet blocking the way..
At the same time, I get very contented with the happy little things in life. Like.. how the flowers grow to be so beautiful.. How the air smells so nice in the morning.. And how idiotic yet cute most of my friends are.
I treasure my friendships greatly. HELLO FRIENDS. I LOVE YOU GUYS.
I'm constantly thinking/worrying about something. Yes, I'm a worrywart.
I'm a sucka for cute things and sad faces. I CANNOT RESIST PUPPY DOG FACES. But no, I'm not a soft-hearted tofu. T_T
I'm seriously seriously accident-prone. Ask people that went on the Philippines trip and you'll know. I was constantly falling down, knocking my head on something or twisting my ankle.
When I was young, I was a 'cute monster kid', description as quoted by Geri. I would do cute things, but at the same time, I'd beat up my kindergarten teacher for making me do work.
I don't like tagging other people to do meme's. HAHA. So yeah. NOT. TAGGING.

Before I end off, I'd just like to express how amazed I am at the number of people that actually follow what I say in my personalised message on MSN. I put "PEOPLE PEOPLE. MAKE ME STUDY." and zomg it friggin' works. So many people keep telling me to study, LOL. Thank you guysssss.

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Now playing: Kelly Clarkson - Addicted
via FoxyTunes

no where, at all. 7:22 pm

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Hahahaha my cousin is nuts. I was studying and she came to sit beside me.. Then proceeded to take my red pen and grab my hand. And drew this shit on my hand:

The annoying thing is, IT FRICKING LOOKS LIKE SOMETHING I WOULD DRAW ON MY FRIENDS' HANDS. LOL.

Anyway, ya, just a random post. And yes, that is the Advertising textbook in the background. T_T

Ganbatte, Sem 2.1 Mass Commers!

no where, at all. 11:48 pm

I just wanted to express my hate for people on msn who set shortcuts for emoticons with actual words.

Classic example.

I feel so

I got curious so I right-clicked and clicked add to see the shortcut. And omg, it was 'bored'. WTF MAN. Then I carried on the conversation, only to find that there were more annoying emoticons coming out of every sentence. With stuff like, "I going out later." And the word 'go' has a stupid emoticon pointing outwards and screaming.

So it becomes, "I

ing out later." WTFFFFFF.

And the MOST irritating of all is when people start having an emoticon for every LETTER. They have an animated letter for every letter of the alphabet so it takes 923420899385 million years to load every sentence, not to mention it's glittery, bevel and embossed, multi-coloured and hard to read.

Unfortunately I don't have an example of that because I usually block and delete people who do that, or just ignore them when they speak.

It makes me

.

Oh, and that word was angry. =P

With that said, I don't really hate emoticons. But I just hate it when EXCESSIVE emoticons are used, or when it actually hinders your understanding of a sentence. If after a sentence and you need to express your feeling with an emoticon, it's totally fine with me. (:

no where, at all. 5:01 pm

I feel stupid. (Note: FEEL, not AM)

I got shocked by msn alerts while having my earphones on, plugged into the laptop.

Okay, twice.

DON'T MOCK ME.

On another note, I is not studying as well as I should as usual. And my body clock is still as screwed up because on days that do not require me to wake up at a certain time, I just sleep in till....... well let's just say, late afternoon. -Looks around and whistles innocently-

K I shall go sleep now. At... almost 5.30am >.>

One last shoutout before I end this post though:

HELLO MUMMY PIGGY. IF YOU ARE READING THIS, I JUST WANNA SAY.... HAHA YOU CANNOT WIGGLE YOUR EARS. =3 I know I can't now too, at least I was able to last time! xD

And this is youuuu.
(^(oo)^)

Such a smiley and nice mummy piggy hor? LuBzXzXx EuUxZxXxZz! *COOKIES*

P.S. I only did this extra section for you to terrorise you cause you just said goodnight and sent me the stupid kissy bunny again and it scarred me for life D:

P.P.S. Get well sooooooooon!

no where, at all. 5:10 am

Saturday, February 16, 2008

Hah, what a joke.

Throughout all these years I've known you, you really haven't changed at all, you annoying bastard. Just because you're LONELY doesn't mean you can come running to me only when you need me. You tell people to quit whining but you carry on whining yourself, wallowing in self-pity because you had a tiff with your girlfriend and she's ignoring you. Wait, hang on, WHAT girlfriend? You knew her from ONLINE and you haven't met her even once and you make it seem as if you're so serious about her. And you get pissed with the world because of any little thing she does to you.

I tell you I'm busy with studying or work but yet you still keep bugging me to talk to you, with the simple reason of, "I'm bored" or "I'm lonely". Most of the times I'd oblige, but seriously, enough is enough, you need to get a grip on yourself.

Told you to quit smoking, you wouldn't listen. Told you to get out more often, you wouldn't listen. Told you to stop being so sad over little stuff, you wouldn't listen either. You might hate me for god knows how long for this post because you're a hating, grudge-bearing fella but really, it is for your sake. Those friends of yours, they're not helping at all, they just make you sink even deeper. They call you out when they need your money for smokes and booze but do you even know what they say about you behind your back? Most of our old group of friends have gave up on you but I figured, surely a shred of the old you would still remain? I held on to that hope, so I still wanted to be friends.. BUT you've changed too much, and too much for the worse.

Oh my god, seriously, do some self-reflection. I know you read my blog, so if you've read this, I really hope you don't take this as a hate post, take it as a critical judgment or whatever shit and THINK about what you're doing with your life please. And when you think you're ready, we're waiting for the old you.

no where, at all. 12:21 am

Friday, February 15, 2008

Now MRM is over and all that's left is Advertising until we get our well deserved break from school. I should be relieved since that's one hurdle down and only one more to go but right at this moment, I find it hard to rejoice because.. I have a confession. But it's gonna be long, don't say I didn't warn. =/

I feel as if I'm driving on a rainy night. On this never-ending road that's always having road works and I can't see what's ahead of me. Only able to try my best to avoid or knock down the obstructions as they come along. Maybe that's what life is all about, maybe it's just a long run whereby you face endless difficulties and in the end, you face death. Some people choose to skip the middle parts and go straight to death, thinking it would be the easy way out and thinking it would solve all their problems. I can see why they think that way, but I don't have the courage to do what they do. I fear death. Or should I say, I fear what comes after death.

I know some might think it's a silly thought, but I do believe in life after death. I've witnessed some stuff in my dreams about what might be my afterlife and from then on, I constantly asked myself these questions: "What will happen after I die?", "Where will I go after I die?", "Who will I meet after I die?", "Will anyone grief over me?" and most importantly, "Will I see her again?"

I never used to think I was alone because I had a soul mate. Someone I was lucky enough to meet so early into my life. Sure, I still felt like I was driving on a never-ending road, but at least, I had a companion sitting beside me in the passenger seat, talking to me while I drive, keeping me awake so I won't get into an accident, cheering me up when I'm stumped by an obstacle and sharing joy with me as I overcome yet another obstacle.

Life has never been the same without you.

I lost all faith in justice because if there were justice, you wouldn't be gone and he wouldn't be let off so lightly.

I lost all faith in religion because if there were gods, they wouldn't let something happen to someone like you.

I lost all faith in friendships because what can I say, you're irreplaceable and I'll never be able to be as close to someone else.

I lost all faith in trust because you promised you'd wait for me to return and we'd talk about my trip, but you were gone.

I lost all faith in self-confidence because you were my source of confidence in it's totality.

I lost all faith.

Whenever something would happen at home or anywhere else for that matter, you'd be the first person I go to. And you'd do the same if anything happened to you. We never got sick of talking to each other, much to the amazement of our parents, since we talk almost everyday for hours and hours. It's like we never run out of stuff to say to each other. Right now, I just feel like I have nobody to talk to anymore. Whenever I try to say something to someone, there's like this force holding me back, not letting me share what I really feel to anyone and not long after, I'll forget what I wanted to share and I'm back to square one. It's not that I want to brood, I've tried hard to let go, I really have. But It's like I can't advance. It's like I can't move on. It's like I can't forget.

I just can't let go somehow and I have nobody.

I feel like I'm really fake. It all started as I entered poly, if I remember correctly. But you were the only one who knew of that, and you were the only one whom I was comfortable being myself around. I feel like I have this facade that I can't help but feel obliged to keep up, this image of a happy-go-lucky girl that jokes every 3 minutes. I don't know who I'm protecting by doing that because deep down, I know I'm not someone like that. On one hand I think it's because I want to protect myself and clamp myself shut. But on the other hand, I think I don't want the people around me to know who I really am. Maybe for fear of losing even more of them. But ah, I guess that makes both reasons selfish then. Maybe this is why I loathe blogging sometimes, because blogging tends to let me bring out the real me, which I try so hard to keep in when in the real world. There's just something about the virtual world, this amazing ability, that makes people reveal their true selves.

But here, today, I confess.

I'm sorry if you had to read this long emo post. But after witnessing some stuff today, I realised that I'm really tired. Really tired of keeping this false pretense up. Now you see the real me. Of course, not everything about me has been fake. All the things I tell you guys, you can trust that it's real. But I'm just saying, I'm not myself. I don't know how else to express that better than those three words, "I'm not myself".

I don't know if I'll change to become more like myself but I know I'm quite reluctant. After all, who likes an emo, brooding girl?

I don't know if you guys will change your perception of me either but if it does happen, I hope it's not too much. Because trust me, I'm putting in my best effort to climb out of this deep abyss that I've fallen into.

Who knows, maybe one day, when I've successfully climbed out of here, the true me wouldn't be such a worthless emo girl after all?

no where, at all. 8:28 pm

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Ahhhhh I so totally overslept today and woke up with half the day gone, meaning.. I DON'T HAVE MUCH TIME LEFT TO STUDY MRM. Oh my gawd, can you tell I'm panicking? And I know I can stay up tonight to study but my aunt doesn't allow me to stay up late tonight cause I have a morning paper D:

Oh the horror! The pain! -Insert more dramatic sequences here-

What's worse is I woke up with a very bad sore throat and flu today. Oh of all the times, it had to happen now. >.> As usual, Murphy is hard at work to keep his laws in place.

This is what I get up to when I'm stressed. Yes, I draw super random stuff. And yes, I draw to distress, I AM NOT FROM ART CLUB. I just.... find drawing quite therapeutic.

If you're wondering why it's so blur, it's cause I drew it on the backing of a foolscap pad and also because I used a lousy phone camera with super lousy resolution to take it and bluetooth to my laptop. D: See I so totally need a digital camera right? *Hintsssssss* xD

I guess that's about it for this update, just wanted to take a slight break from studying. =/

Good luck for tomorrow's paper guys. Study hard!

P.S. Anybody got Advertising notes? =S

no where, at all. 4:08 pm

Oooooooh mai gawd. 噢, 我的老天啊.

Geri the sleep-right-after-dinner-pig has outdone herself yet again.

Click to enlarge!

-_______- Somebody please slap her.

And just in case you don't get the joke, Totally Triple Chocolate is a new chocolate milk from Magnolia. And this next thing I'm gonna say, I've repeated it so many times at Open House that I can still remember it.

For more information on Magnolia's new line of cool beverages, please check out www.magnolia.com.sg/expressyourflava

But here's a picture of the 2 flavours! Screamin' Strawberry and yes, Totally Triple Chocolate.

On another note, yes, I'm still loving MRM deeply and spending my Valentine's Day with MRM... Oooh I just looooove MRM. BIG KISS FOR MRM =3=

P.S. Blog font gonna be this size from now on! Getting sick of the smaaaaaallll chibi fonts :D

no where, at all. 2:49 am

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Hey, I'm back. 3 months without blogging, I was getting kinda used to it.

But all of a sudden, I just had the urge to blog again. Sure, I've had many urges to blog in these past 3 months, but this time really actually managed to get me bothered enough to do it. I don't know why, maybe it's because I never really did get over it. Talking about it again today just made me realise that, and made me realise again just how much I miss her. I miss her laughter, miss her sillyness, miss her annoying questions and miss her innocent puppy dog faces or incessant giggles when she would need a favour.

I came home thinking about it over and over in my head, thinking how it might've been different somehow if some little part of it changed. Would I have been able to make a difference somehow? No, I suppose not. And that fact annoys me to no end because I couldn't have done anything either even if I was here.

I couldn't sleep well earlier, I had a lot on my mind. And when I really did get down to falling asleep, I had a weird nightmare I've never had and I got awoken by that. I drifted off to sleep again only to be awoken by a random SMS from my cousin half an hour later, which was strange, cause I -never- get woken up by something this minor. I couldn't really fall asleep again, so I just tossed and turned for an hour plus, until my alarm would ring.

I don't think I'll ever get over it totally. Who am I kidding, how would I be able to do that when she was such a big part of my life? When she left, I felt like a big chunk of my whatever body/soul/heart was forcefully ripped away from me. I tried to fill in the gap she left with whatever I could manage to find, but it never really did work now did it? I keep steering my thoughts away from her but somehow my annoying mind keeps finding a way to wiggle back to the topic.

Hey girl, if you can read this or perhaps even feel what I'm feeling, I just want you to know I haven't forgotten about you and that I miss you more than ever.

From your eternal best friend,
Yuin

no where, at all. 10:15 pm

about the girl.